Seducing Storm part I: Marilyn's got nothing on Munroe

Ever noticed how hot Storm is?

Chris Claremont certainly has. In many ways, Ororo Munroe can be described as Chris' dream woman... Not only is she a strong, independent individual... Ororo also makes it a point to fight naughty evildoers in skimpy black leather outfits held together by either a choker or a slave collar... That's enough to make any SM-enthusiast pant and wince with excitement.

An awful lot of X-men villains found Storm to be totally irresistible. It goes without saying she wasn't too happy about all that unwanted attention. Luckily for those spurned yet smitten supervillains, there's always mind control...

Wait, wait... Lets not jump the gun, even though after this two parter who wouldn't be temped to jump in front of one? Sit back and lets review the seductors of Storm, starting with this sweaty, Morocco Mole cosplaying charmer...

Storm caught the lusting super villain's eye pretty young in life. As a little girl on the streets of Cairo, she survived as a pickpocketing thief under the tutelage of Achmed El Gibar. Unbeknownst to her, Cairo's master thief had promised the young girl to the crimelord Amahl Farouk... who was little more than a host for the psychic monstrosity known as the Shadow King.

The King sensed Storm's mutant potential and intended to groom her. Yet, he wasn't able to make good on his plans after he accidentally got his host body killed when Amahl Farouk was foolish enough to challenge a visiting Charles Xavier to a fight on the astral plane.
For more on that, click here. 

Half a lifetime later, the Shadow King had just recently acquired a new host when he came across Storm, and wanted a second chance. He failed, of course... and would try again later in Joe Kelly's 1997 run on X-men when he'd pose as the African goddess Anansi. Oh, and for the record, the reason Storm looks so young is the result of a mind control heavy story featured here.

Being inherently evil isn't the only way to Storm's heart. Sometimes just being a monarch will do too, as Arkon the Imperion found out in 1981's Uncanny X-men annual. Arkon rules over Polemachus, an extra-dimensional world that derives its light and power from a series of orbital energy rings.

Unfortunately, these rings regularly tend to lose their charge. Whenever that happens Arkon comes to Earth looking for help. That is, if by 'looking for help' you mean forcibly taking what or whoever you want. In this case, he figured Storm's lightning could recharge the rings, but sparks flew and young love soon was a fact. No mind control here, though it'd be pretty hard to resist the ruler of an entire world who also has a pretty big... quiver... he just dangles there for everyone to see.

Speaking of half naked rulers of all they convey... When the X-men were in the Savage Land, Storm and the others were captured and subjected to mind control experiments. But only Ororo caught the eye of Brainchild, the leader of the Savage Land Mutates...

Despite his boorish behaviour, its hard to feel threatened by someone like Brainchild. So, lets move on to true villainy... Storm was even able to melt the armor clad heart of Doctor Doom.

While her fellow X-men were fighting for their very lives, Doctor Doom invited Storm to dinner and the two of them actually had a good time making googly eyes at one another... That is, until Doom felt it was time to earn his keep as a villain and a dastardly deed was called for...

You see, an added aspect to most of the flirts Storm enjoyed with the bad guys, involved them wanting not only her heart... cos that would have been too easy...  No, every single one of them made it a point to exclaim their desire for her heart, body and soul... forever!

In this case, Doom turns her into a living statue... not just to imprison her, but also to preserve her beauty for the ages. As far as torture goes, that actually sounds somewhat poetic. Still, all a statue does is take up space and look pretty and even the good doctor knows a talented woman like Storm is capable of doing much more than that... So he improvises...

Imprisoning the original and building a robot double to use as your houseslave? Hardly behaviour befitting a king. At least Storm's next baddie beau had more class and a straightforward approach...

Yup... that's Vlad 'Dracula' the Impaler alright... He was so taken with Storm that he decided to make her his bride. Making an African American woman the princess of darkness just seems wrong or at least slightly superfluous. Moving on...

The Brood?

Well, yes... Storm and her fellow X-men were selected by the Brood Queen herself to be hosts for her daughters, she personally implanted them with the embryo of a Brood princess. As a side effect of that implantation, the X-men spent a few cosy, slightly dazed days with what they thought were Shi'ar... It wasn't until Wolverine's healing factor broke the conditioning that it became clear the team was being kept on the Brood homeworld, waiting for the eggs to hatch.

So, a monarch wants Storm to be hers and uses mind control to achieve that goal? I'd say the Brood qualify...

The X-men finally managed to escape the Brood homeworld on board Lilandra's royal space cruiser Z'reee Shar. Wolverine was the only one who knew what was going on after having defeated his own Brood egg, Storm was second to realise something was wrong.

After discovering her infection, she took one of the Shar's shuttlecrafts and fled. In the vastness of space, she managed to become one with the universe itself (don't ask)... An act that burned the Brood egg to a crisp, but also destroyed the shuttle... seemingly condemning Storm to die. Yet, she turned up alive and sort of well by next issue...

"The Acanti and I... Are one."

Ah, yeah... this one's going to take some 'splainin'... The Acanti are a sentient race of massive, brown and pink space whales that the Brood have hunted for ages. But the young leader of the Acanti, the so called Prophet Singer, has managed to stay free which is the one piece of good news.

Unfortunately, its mother fell victim to the Brood which left her child virtually defenseless. Enter Storm: the Acanti encountered her dying form in space and decided to kill two birds with one proverbial stone by placing her inside the Acanti for safe keeping. This allowed her mind to act as a mothering influence to the child leader of his ancient race.

And to be fair, she never looked better doing it...

Next time, Seducing Storm part 2: Ororo gets a mohawk and the supervillains keep on keeping on.

Storm's smooth seduction

Lets revisit the last part of our previous post.

Back in Uncanny X-men # 221, Storm was off to find her former fling Forge when she came across the mystical murderers known as the Eye Killers.

With a little help from Forge's old mentor Nazé, Storm defeated them and continued on her journey. Completely unaware that Nazé wasn't exactly who he claimed to be. Back in issue # 188, he fell victim to The Adversary, his oldest foe... who used mind control to take over his shape.

Nazé was taken over by The Adversary, a chaos bringer from another realm whose sole purpose is to destroy order and cause as much mayhem as needed to achieve that goal. The only person capable of stopping his reign of terror is Forge, who isn't merely a mutant inventor but also a Cherokee shaman with great mystical potential...

Unfortunately, Storm doesn't know any of this. 'Nazé' actually claims Forge is the one who is about to cause reality to collapse.  Forge rejected his Cherokee heritage and destiny as a shaman to pursue his own dreams. Claremont cleverly uses this established fact to have 'Nazé' convince Storm that Forge had actually gone mad.

Storm agreed to help find and stop Forge and away we go. But, not before we are treated to this disturbing scene...

Forget the Eye Killers that show up a page or 5 later, the real toe curling drama is seeing Storm  fight off the sexual avances of a man almost certainly twice her age. Ow, wait... she doesn't. In fact, she seems rather into it. If only she knew who he really was.

But, The Adversary really does play the part of elderly native American shaman to the hilt, even feigning injury after the Eye Killers' attack.

"Caught some venom from those demons we fought. Figured my own magicks could handle it."

Ow golly my, whát a pickle indeed... 'Nazé' has Storm forage the woods, finding the necessary ingredients for a mystical healing potion. She cooks them up into a broth, while delivering one of the most unbelievable monologues ever in comics or anywhere else for that matter.

"Nazé, this is your restorative brew, concocted by me to your instructions and specification... as I laid our fire with medicinal woods and herbs you had me gather. I must say, my friend... I usually find most incense cloying and unpleasant, but this is quite the opposite. Akin to standing in a high country forest meadow, before a crisp, cool morning breeze. My head has never felt so clear, my thoughts so keen..."

... I'm sorry to interrupt you there, Storm... but while you were ranting about the fact your herbal medicine smells like one of those pine tree shaped air fresheners for your car... that feeble, infirm Nazé just died.

No, just kidding... no one dies when the living embodiment of universal entrophy is using their body as a time share. 'Nazé' recovers, but he has Storm take a sip of the brew as well, just to be sure. And then this happens...

In a nice nod to an earlier New Mutants arc, what appears to be a demon bear shows up to kill Storm. But before she can properly react, the bear has shifted shapes... forcing her to face...

Keep in mind that the theme here is subtle male domination of a strong female like Storm. By first pairing her against a bear, a symbol of hulking, manly power... Claremont follows this by having Ororo combat a large snake. 

It might be considered poor symbolism if the snake itself was simply considered an analogue for the male sexual organ... But Claremont himself adds another log to the fire when he makes sure to point out the snake is keeping Storm from reaching the top of the spire where Forge (and her salvation) can be found.

Eventually, she triumphs against the snake, eagerly engages hordes of demons in her struggle to reach the top of the spire. But when she finally does come face to face with the man she used to love...
Forge seems a little... off.

Call me crazy, but when the hand of the man you love, yet have been instructed to stab on sight, changes into metal claws... I would shoot and maim everything in sight. Yet, this is what Ororo does.

"I am bound..."
Powerful symbolism indeed, as she manages to overcome her instincts and actually succeeds in stabbing her lover.

However, it doesn't exactly have the imagined effect...

'Nazé' tricked Storm into this vivid, nightmaresque fever dream after forcing here to drink the 'restorative' potion he had her prepare. The Adversary had succeeded in properly conditioning Forge's lover to be the ultimate weapon of his destruction.

But hey, no one said you can't have a little fun before you throw all of existence into chaos. So, next issue opens with Nazé making good on his earlier promise to Storm about chasing her. It results in this charming exchange:

Aaaaand scene.

The eyes have it... under (mind)control

Claremont's penchant for preferential treatment when it comes to his pet characters doesn't limit itself to strong females like Storm, Rogue, Ms. Marvel, Kitty Pryde or Sage... Sometimes, even bad guys get lucky... Even when seemingly nobody ever asked or wondered about them. Needless to say, there's mind control involved in today's entry about... The Eye Killers.

These ominously occular specific homicidal maniacs first appeared during Claremont's run on Doctor Strange, master of the mystic arts. In issue # 38 of his book, Stephen Strange and his disciple Clea encountered two siblings while investigating the murder of Douglas Royce, a friend of their associate Sara Wolfe.

"I must be getting paranoid... they're only students"

Well. Maybe yeah, maybe not.

The doctor and Clea soon learn they're dealing with the Eye Killers... Soul stealing demons from native American lore, cruel and ruthless in their pursuit of controlling and consuming mortal life essences.

Despite a catchy name and flashy eyes, the Eye Killers are no match for the master of the mystic arts... Even though his key to defeating them is about as impressive as waiting a few hours for the actual sun to come up. Still, Strange earned his keep by magically taking care of them permanently. Sort of...

"Perhaps, by the time they return...

 I'll better understand how to fight them"


As resolutions go, that's a corker. Maybe Stephen actually did figure out a way to better fight the soul stealing creatures that are scared by sunlight. But even if he did, he sure neglected to share this information with any of his allies in the superhero community. Check out what happened when the terrible twosome appeared next, this time in Uncanny X-men # 223.

 A little backstory, aka: Previously, on Uncanny X-men... Storm was accidentally shot by an experimental gun that seemingly removed her mutant ability to control the weather. Even though she'd proven herself capable of leading the X-men without super powers, she felt she'd be more of an asset  with her powers restored...

That's why she took a leave of absence to seek out Forge, the inventor of the power nullifier and her one time lover. She was joined on this quest by Nazé, the native american chieftain who had tried and failed to mentor Forge in the magical ways of his people.

Unfortunately, their search for Forge was interruped by the appearance of a scared, young woman and her assailant who proved to be a little more fearsome than they appeared.

And Eye Killers do enjoy the classics when it comes to beating their enemy... so, here goes...

Storm took care of the two demons and that was that... after only two appearances, the saga of the Eye Killers was over. Seems only fitting, because most of us have only two eyes anyway...*

*... ow, that joke killed me.

Shi'aring the mind control

Ah, love... it truly is a many splendored thing.

Remember how professor Xavier used to have a thing for Lilandra Neramani, the now deceased ruler of the starspanning Shi'ar empire? Theirs was a love both long distance and improbable. And ow yes, fraught with mind control.

Before her first appearance in Uncanny X-men # 105, Lilandra's presence was felt through the many intense nightmares Charles Xavier had been experiencing. The one constant in all his vision like dreams was a human creature dressed in an advanced, alien spacesuit. At first, Charles dismissed all of it, chalking them up to mere fatigue... But alien astronauts become kind of hard to ignore once they actually beam in for coffee...

Notice how Xavier instantaneously knew the alien's name was Lilandra? A lucky guess, you say? Well, not quite. Claremont actually tied this arc to a storyline from the original X-men run in the late sixties that featured the alien menace known as the Z'nox.

Back in the late 60s, Charles became aware of this warlike, psychopathic race that was totally devoid of love, empathy or mercy. Worse of all: The Z'nox were gathering their forces to invade Earth. In an early example of Professor Xavier is a jerk! syndrome, Charles decided to keep sitting on this information (no wheelchair pun intended). He became convinced he alone was capable of warding off the Z'nox so he faked his own death and went underground for months to prepare and a plan.

Eventually, he devised a way to defeat the psychopatic, unfeeling alien race. Using his massive telepathic talents, Charles contacted every sentient being on the planet at once, explaining the situation and asking them to focussing on all that is good and noble about mankind.

He then focussed all these thoughts and emotions in what can only be described as a 'decency beam' that he fired straight into space towards the approaching armada. All these 'good vibrations' caused the Z'nox great pain and forced them to abandon their invasion plans... The 60s, everybody!

Right before Charles Xavier fired off his mental love rocket, Shi'ar princess Lilandra Neramani had just escaped her pursuers. As the disapproving younger sister of the mad Shi'ar emperor D'ken, Lilandra was rather unpopular with both D'ken and the military. They all planned for Lilandra to have a little 'accident'.

But she survived, as this Claremont written issue of Classic X-men shows... Only to be caught in the backlash of Xavier's Z'nox attack.

Falling victim to an unwanted wave of alien emotions, Lilandra scrambled to her feet. But... Were they hers, really?

In a flash, she not only saw Charles Xavier's life pass before her eyes... Somehow, she connected to his very being and got mind controlled by it...

" I am human. But humanity is a state of mind..."
Speaking of state of minds... it wasn't long before Lilandra got Charles' entire mind forced upon herself...

"Yet (...) even in that first, terrible moment... her mind... trained to repel the slightest psychic invasion... and her spirit, which since birth has reveled in its defiant, unviolable solitude, untouched and untouchable... do no resist this alien intruder but (...) welcome him."

For what were supposed to be basic Classic X-men back up strips, Claremont sure gave his readers their money's worth.

Two minds, fighting over just who is in control. Wonder how that'll play itself out...

"She doesn't like it..."

To be fair, who would enjoy waking up one day to find yourself violated by what can only be generously described as a chimpansee's mind?

As unfair as this may sound, that is how humans must appear to the Shi'ar, a race of avian (!) aliens that rule large chunks of the known galaxy. And to have one of the ruling cast fall hopelessly in love with a mammal? An invalid mammal hailing from a backwards, backwater little world that hasn't even mastered basic interstellar travel?

That'd be like the daughter of the president shacking up with a peg legged duck. Both unheard of AND uncalled for. Still, its what happened once Charles and Lilandra met up.

And not long afterwards, we learn just what Lilandra was running from before she got herself accidentally mind controlled by her one, true love.

Meet the big meany, the one thing Lilandra fears above else... Even D'Ken himself doesn't disturb her half as much as this...

Its a Soul Drinker, an outer dimensional creature that enjoys sucking down on the soul of D'ken's enemies... still, how hard would it be to avoid the creature? Why not run away from it?

Having an alien, mind controlling creature coming for her soul... Threating to suck it out and forever make her a part of itself made Lilandra feel very scared indeed. Yet... isn't Charles Xavier every bit as much an alien creature trying to control and consume her mind? And you share your bed with him!

Yeah... the irony slaps you in the face about as hard as the soul sucking Shi'ar creature.

The Byrne & Claremont reunion is only a mind control away*

What if... Chris Claremont and John Byrne had never broken up?

Surely, its a question many fans of their seminal Uncanny X-men run must have asked themselves. What did the world miss out on because John Byrne left over creative differences after issue #144?

We'll never know for sure, but judging from Claremont and Byrne's 2004 collaboration on Justice League of America, its pretty safe to say the world dodged a bullet when these two legendary creators parted ways back in 1981.

What did Chris & John have in store for their big reunion shot? Why, stick to what you know, of course... So, lets get this mind control party started. The Silver Age is back, baby... and it wants to claim your soul... Forever!

Justice League: The Tenth Circle focussed on, well, The Tenth Circle. Who? Thousands of years ago, the Amazons fought and banished this band of equally ancient vampires to another dimension. In recent years, one of them had managed to weasel his way back here. That would be the villain to beat: Crucifer (a play on Lucifer and Crucifix, but don't tell anyone!)

So far, so 1970s... In six issues, the Justice League went up against Crucifer, his band of flunkies, met up with the all new Doom Patrol and... Ow, I just don't have the energy for this. Can anyone help out with the obligatory info dump?

Ah... Thanks J'onn. Crucifer's big plan was to get his fellow Tenth Circle vampires back to Earth. But, he needed bodies for them. No problem, you just go out and mind control some people off the street...

What's Superman doing there? Heh, well, the little girl is called Nudge, she controls minds by gently 'nudging' them to go along with her wishes. Even Kryptonian ones as it turns out. 

You're a scared, young girl who is unwillingly working for a bad guy and you have just managed to ensnare the world's strongest hero. What do you do?

Do you force him to take you away from there, or maybe send him to get the other JLA members? You might even consider releasing him altogether so he can take the lead and help out. World's strongest hero, after all.

But no, she just takes him along as one of Crucifer's captives. Because if anyone can beat an immortal vampire, its the man of steel.

... Well, twas worth a shot...no need to bite my head off, sheesh. 

With Superman already under one form of mind control, Claremont and Byrne have an uber-vampire snack on him as well. Crucifer didn't actually turn him, because Kryptonian blood isn't exactly appetising (and he probably doesn't need the super powered competition).

After snacking on one of his enthralled followers, Crucifer was ready for the next step of his plan.

With a little 'help' from Superman, Crucifer took on Faith, the JLA's resident psychic and potential threat to his plans. Bless her heart, she even made a Buffy the vampire slayer reference before Crucifer took her out.

Crucifer wasn't all about business, though... He also enjoyed revenge, specifically against the Amazons who had driven out his kind. This means the JLA's resident Amazon was about to get humbled by a mind controlled Superman.

Yes Diana, I also felt there was something strange going on. Like how a comic from 2004 read like it was written in the early 70s... Back when this sort of storytelling was already tired and out of date.

But enough meta commentary, on to the obligatory hero versus hero part of the exercise.

Crucifer mortally wounds Wonder Woman, forcing Batman to leave the scene so he can save Diana. Crucifer is free to continue unopposed... Time for the end game, lets bring back the tenth circle...

...Ow for heaven's sake, Chris?

Your big reunion with Byrne climaxes in a giant burning X that draws in hordes of mindless slaves that defend it with their very lives. This X might be nothing more than the Roman numeral 10, or it could be a little tiny dig at the X-men franchise and their hordes of slavishly devoted fans.

Yeah. Probably not. Lets stick with what we know for the finale. You guessed it: more mind control!

Yup, the only reason Crucifer kept his cronies around was for them to get mind controlled by his returning fellow Tenth Circle vampires.

"Out with the old, in with the new", eh, Chris?

Try that with your story telling techniques sometimes.

*... With sincerest apologies to Paul Simon